Frequently Asked Questions (click on question for answer)

Can you provide advice about my particular situation?

We are very sorry, but we simply cannot give you any advice, over the phone or on-line. The heart of our program is the sharing of information and experiences that takes place within the support group.

Can you give me a referral for where to send my child?

TOUGHLOVE Australia does not refer people to boot camps or treatment facilities. The parents in the group will let you know which professionals and services have been helpful to their families and which ones have not.

Where is the nearest Parent Support Group located?

All meetings are held online via Zoom on Tuesday or Thursday at 7:15pm.

What kind of trouble does my child have to be in for me to need this group?

You are the one who decides what is a problem in your home. TOUGHLOVE Parent Support Groups help parents with a wide range of problems from, "my child won't clean his bedroom" to "my child has been arrested for...". If you are concerned about your child's behaviour, that is enough.

Is it my fault that my child is in trouble?

We are not interested in blaming anyone. A TOUGHLOVE Parent Support Group is a group of caring adults who will understand what you are going through. We know you have done the best that you can with the tools that you have.

What if my spouse won't go with me to the Group?

That's not unusual. You will find other people in the group in the same situation. Go anyway. You are welcome to bring a friend or relative for support.

Is there a fee?

There is a one-time charge for the materials you will need to work with in the group. There is also a small monthly fee requested for attending weekly meetings which is paid electronically. Please contact your local organisation for current details.

Does my child go with me to the group?

No. The group is for parents and other adults who care about you and your family. Your child does not need to know everything that you are doing.

Are you a religious program?

No. We are not affiliated with any religious organisation.

What kind of Program does TOUGHLOVE offer?

We are a network of Parent Support Groups for parents having difficulties with children aged from 10 upwards.

Will you tell me what to do?

Changes you need to make may be different from those of other people. You are in charge of making decisions about your life and your family. Other parents in the group will only offer you suggestions based on what has worked for them and other people.

Why do I need to go to a Group when my child is the one with the problem?

If you ask your child if he or she has a problem, they will answer no. If someone asks you if you have a problem, you will answer yes. You need to go to the group to create an action plan to help your child and that plan includes a support system. Making changes is not easy and you will need a support system created of people who understand where you are.

Can I just buy the material?

Yes, you can purchase the TOUGHLOVE materials. Remember that you cannot simply purchase the "support" part of the program. Support and attendance at weekly meetings is what makes the TOUGHLOVE Program unique and successful. Most people cannot "change" life-long behaviours without appropriate support.

How long will it take before I see changes in my child's behaviour?

Your situation took time to develop and it will likely take time to resolve. How long? We cannot say for sure. Parents who attend over time and follow the program are more confident and supported when dealing with behaviour.

What is TOUGHLOVE Australia?

TOUGHLOVE is a non-profit, self-help organisation that provides ongoing education and active support to families, empowering parents and young people to accept responsibility for their actions and to stop destructive behaviours. We encourage families to network with community leaders, agencies and each other, to help parents regain control of their homes and their lives, making communities safer places in which to live.

What can I do if my question is not answered here?

Please ask us via the TOUGHLOVE Contact Us page.